7 Secrets To Mastering Communication – Secret #6 Collaborate

7 Secrets To Mastering Communication – Secret #6 Collaborate

Welcome back to 7 Secrets To Mastering Communication


“The secret is to gang up on the problem, rather than each other.” Thomas Stallkamp

Change. Do you thrive on it or relish the status quo? Either way, change is the one constant in life and in relationships that can wreak havoc if you’re not able to collaborate and  navigate through it without stress, worry and self-sabotaging talk from your Internal Chain of Command.

When one party grows at a different pace or events both unexpected and planned result in surprising consequences that we hadn’t imagined, there can be challenges and stress. Sometimes seemingly unequal situations can cause resentment and anger. Think of how professional changes, financial losses or emergency health issues can impact you and your relationship.

The relationship can still grow, but sometimes in an unanticipated direction and this can be threatening. When we learn to collaborate with our partner, we come from an open place of “What’s In It For Us?” . Each party accepts the other for who they are and where they are in life at that moment. Regardless of the curve balls life throws our way, when we collaborate, we always have our partner’s back.

Seeing the power in accepting change as a normal process in relationships and seeing that no matter where anyone is, each person can benefit when invited to be part of a collaborative solution. It can also mean letting your partner come up with his or her own solution and letting go of your agenda. This is where compassion comes into play, too. Remember we all have a higher self if we allow ourselves to hear its voice. We already have the answers within and collaboration serves to bring them out as a team.

4 Strategies For More Collaboration In Your Relationships

  1. Get a buy-in from your partner by setting up a time to talk in a non-threatening, non-judgmental way.
  2. Reassure your partner that they haven’t done anything wrong and that you just need or want to discuss something that is on your mind.
  3. Invite the other person to finding a solution together in a “What’s In It For Us” mindset.
  4. If it’s a heavy topic, how can you lighten it up? Discussing the heavy stuff doesn’t have to feel like a business talk. How can you set it up in a more inviting arrangement or place? What can you do after the talk for each other? Attention and affection go a long way here.

How do you collaborate in your relationships?

I’m so glad you are here! If you liked this post, please leave your comments and feel free to share it with family and friends.

To Cultivating Collaboration!


If you’re frustrated at not being heard, feel like your needs are not being met, say “Yes” when you really want to say “No” and take things personally, then you should definitely contact me today about my innovative online Compatibility Index. In less than 60 minutes, I can tell you exactly why you are struggling in your conversations and give you tips and strategies for communicating your needs and desires confidently, elegantly and guilt-free!


12 Responses to 7 Secrets To Mastering Communication – Secret #6 Collaborate

  1. Emily Stoik says:

    Deb, these are Great tips!! Communication skills are so important for business, relationships, LIFE in general!! Thank you for these and stopping by with your comments on my blog as well! I can tell you love to write! Me too :-)

    • Deb says:

      You and Shawn are such inspirational examples of creating freedom. Although now that I wrote that, I realize Freedom does not need to be created, it is our birthright and needs to be claimed by each and every one of us. I’m glad you stopped by and are enjoying my posts.

  2. Dina dove says:

    Deb, I love collaboration. Everyone needs to feel like they have a stake in the decision making process and then there can be harmony. Thanks for the tips.

    PS: Have you ever played the game, Cashflow. It is won thru collaboration. Fascinating game.

  3. Amy says:

    You’ve done it again, Deb, I just want to absorb your communication wisdom into my heart. It has really helped me learn how to be a better communicator. I love the suggestion about the “What’s in it for Us” mindset.
    Amy recently posted…A Day at our House: the Unvarnished Truth, Honest!My Profile

  4. tracy says:

    Thank you for the reminder about communication! :0) Happy day your way!

  5. Change in any form seems so hard to accept especially with near and dear ones who are so used to seeing or feeling a person in their own perspective and feels threatened causes them discomfort. And you are right on target about communicating with your higher self.

    This is definitely a helpful article. thank you.

  6. Deb I can feel the love and excitement that you put in your work. I love your win-win attitude and how can we work it out for the highest good of all.

    Deb I also really like the way you show your excitement about people stopping by your blog and how they can share it with their family and friends and leave their comments.I find it so cool the way you say it.

    Tracey I love the Happy day your way.
    DTaRelle F. Tullis recently posted…Making Time For Mommy Tip #2My Profile

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